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September 2002
Page 9

Suicide Ghost
by Dwayne

My friend's dad had told me that Roy was going to kill himself three days before he injected human insulin into his body. He took three bottles of it. There's a story of why he did it, but that's none of your business, as to respect Roy and all. I didn't think he would do it, but he did. He left a video of anger and release where he proceeded to play the guitar violently and talk about things in songs. I was close to Roy, but I thought everyone else was closer. I think Roy liked the fact that I wasn't out to get him or anything, and all I wanted to due was hang out and play the guitar and share good times. 

When I found out Roy committed suicide, I was on the phone with a friend and we were going to borrow his amp; I remember it well because of call waiting. I said, "Hold on, I have another call." When I reclicked back over, I said, "John, we can't use Roy's amp. He's dead. I'll call you back!" A couple of days went by and his parents wanted us to see the video. We went to the house that everyone meets at, you know, before or after the party. As we watched the video inside the living room in tears, the group and I were quiet and strong the way Roy would want us to be. 

After, we talked about the video in the garage, where the door leads through the house. I had to bring it up, though I still felt creepy about what I had experienced, and I'm not sure when it started, but sometime during the video, the garage door leading through the house had opened as If someone was watching - and it looked like Roy was standing looking at us watch the video of him. Most had seen this because I asked them in private and brought up the question as: "Did anything peculiar happen while you were watching the video?" The ones that could see the door said yes, it looked like Roy was watching through the door. 

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